The Department
of Social Scrutiny
Fears that today's RMT announcement of a coordinated series of tube and network rail strikes over the Summer will lead to transport chaos around London have been narrowly averted by an emergency map published by Network Rail.
"The map carries full details of the services and connections available to passengers for the duration of the industrial action", claimed a Network Rail spokesman, who wished to remain anonymous for operational reasons. "You can clearly see from the map that the network can adapt well to the disruption and passengers may not even realise there's a strike on at all."
The map details the National Back-Up Rail Plan (BURP) for the first time. The plan uses amenity rail and tram lines, public footpaths and leylines to connect towns and cities.
Rail chiefs are expecting the maps to arrive in stations soon, though many were delayed at the printers because "they were using the wrong kind of paper".
Until the maps arrive at stations, Network Rail is recommending passengers click here to view the map. (GIF - 75K).
The Department of Social Scrutiny's guide to your entire life in Britain.
Includes all necessary tax and identity card application forms and a full
guide to the British public transport system, as officially sanctioned
by Notwork
Rail.
Plus: New retirement guide "Are You Alright, Dear", handy graduated tea strength colour matching chart and official guidelines for the consumption of cake, biscuits and other snacks served at ambient room temperature.
�Thank God: a book that's both clever and funny.
Deserves a place on the lap of every comedy fan in Britain.� Charlie Brooker
�If you wince at the word 'benchmark', this neat
parody could be
just the thing to cheer you up.� Sunday Telegraph
Magazine
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